"!"?

caught the tail end of PUSH!'s set last thursday. it sounded ok, kinda like four non blondes with a smidge of maserati.

a look at PUSH!'s myspace profile reveals the following:

Push! are not a singer and a backing band. Push! are not a diva and three dudes.

Push! do not support the furthering of the idea that for a woman to be in a band she must either be a backup singer or a solo artist with accompaniment.

Push! profit from the extensive songwriting catalog of the talented Lauren Osborne, but that catalogue is very much something that we have all worked together to completely recreate.

a little defensive, aren't we? but yeah, it's basically 3/4 of astra backing a hot chick singer. also i like how they stick to that exclamation point.

not surprisingly, two moderately well-received shows seem to be going to the sauce's head. after the show, the sauce approached a group of dudes waiting around to see vetran. one of the guys politely said "hey jeremy....y'all sounded good". the sauce simply smiled smuggly and said "yeah, i know".

yet another example of how japanese game shows are better than american ones.

check this out.

Open-hand slap

If you think that John Stossel is as much of a dickhead as I do, and if you think it is funny to see people get slapped, then you will like this.

My New Cell Phone Number

Hello To All You Sexxxy 4KS Posters Out There...

Mr. Mark T. Weathersby here...I hope that everyone is doing well. I would like to take the time to say congratulations to Mr. Makin & his lovely wife Mrs. Makin for the future new addition to their family and to Mr. JK for landing a job and coming back to the ATL.

I would like to take the opportunity to inform everyone that my phone number 706-543-0587 is no longer in service and I've gone completely cellular. My brand new phone number is 706-248-6233. Please make a note and pass it on to anyone who needs it. Take care my fellow 4KSters.

Choclate Luv...

Mr. Pillow Pants

There are plenty of reasons to be skeptical of Clerks II--the 12 years between movies, Kevin Smith's recent track record (that Jay and Silent Bob movie sucked), and just the overall stink of what looks like a cash-in. On Saturday I went to the theater with Mrs. Colonoscopy and lots of doubts.

The truth is that Clerks II is ridiculously funny, funny in some of the ways that the first one was and funny in some new ways as well. I highly recommend it to other members of the 4KS community who enjoy some good filthy comedy. Interestingly enough, this movie includes two comedic bits where it appears that Kevin Smith is directly ripping off Mr. Huevos. Bonus cool points for anyone who can name them.

wherefore art thou, marcus williams.

i suppose it's too early to condemn billy knight's new batch of genius draft picks. but here is what draftexpress.com (which tends to rave about everybody) has to say about shelden william's performance thus far in the summer league:

Shelden Williams played a little better tonight which is to say that he should be able to make a developmental league squad. For the 5th pick in the draft Shelden has looked terrible. He still pulls some rebounds but seems to block shots more by luck than anything else. He isn't bigger and stronger than his competition anymore and it turns out he is slower than almost everyone else on top of that.

not good. one of those not-funny jackasses on blue collar comedy likes to say "you can't fix stupid". well in the NBA, the adage should go "you can't fix slow". i hope shelden turns out to be decent player, but i'm not optimistic.

meanwhile, here's a portion of what they had to say about marcus williams, who at number 22 is the steal of the draft (jordan farmar is another early candidate):

Williams was very good today once again, not shooting the ball quite as well as he did earlier in the summer league, but still doing a fantastic job running his team and making everyone around him better. He got right into the heart of the defense a number of times and made some fantastic passes to his big men for easy finishes. His court vision is second to none and Willaims sees things immediately as they happen.

that hawks couldn't use a player like that, could they? oh, never mind, we signed fucking speedy claxton.

Announcing....

In response to the dwindling population of 4KSers in the Athens area, Mr. and Mrs. Pineapple Colonoscopy are proud to announce the impending arrival of the first junior 4KS member. Slated to arrive in January and to begin posting in January 2012, we hope PC Jr. enjoys the many privileges of associating with the 4KS community.

Don't Believe the (Townie) Hype

As the unofficial 4KS criminal law correspondent, I felt like I should have some insight into the upcoming election for Solicitor General. And you, loyal readers, should care, 4ks readers are much more likely to commit a misdemeanor (which is prosecuted by the Solicitor General) than a felony (prosecuted by the DA). Truth is, I'm hardly sure of who I should vote for, much less who to tell other people to vote for.

I can say one thing: Don't just vote for the liberal candidate of choice (Bill Overend) because he is the liberal candidate of choice. Yes, Flagpole likes him, and yes he does have signs up in most bars, and yes, he's the most liberal candidate, but the last couple years of Athens politics have demonstrated that a liberal run amok is just as bad as anyone else run amok. So how will the townie candidate handle misdemeanors? In his words, about speeding: "Enforce a zero-tolerance policy for drivers caught speeding on those neighborhood streets identified as “problem streets” – no reduction in speed for cited drivers, and no reduced fines. "

Which will be the problem streets? The ones where people call in and bitch about speeders. Which will those be? My money's on Boulevard and 5 points, not Rocksprings and Nellie B. If your speeding endangers five points kids is that any worse than endangering public housing kids? I think there's a difference between being a 'townie' and being an '(our part of the) townie', and this ridiculous idea in particular demonstrates a lack of understanding of the difference. If you take the time to vote in this election, take the time to figure out who you really want to vote for, not necessarily who the liberal establishment says you should vote for.

don't blame the lawyers.

slate's take on the so-called "med mal crisis". the heart of the matter:

"Including legal fees, insurance costs, and payouts, the cost of the suits comes to less than one-half of 1 percent of health-care spending."

a little vindication for our friend tom-tom eaton.

Midsummer Night's Soundtrack

St. Elsewhere Gnarles Barkley
I think I wanted this, and expected this, to be way better than it actually is. That being said, it's still pretty good, though I think it kinda pales next to Danger Doom, or the Danger Mouse/Gemini record, or the Grey Album. Some guy from My Morning Jacket wrote in a recent Sunday NY Times that it's evidence that one or both of these guys (Cee Lo from Goodie Mob and Danger Mouse) will go on to something in league with Marvin Gay or Al Green or somebody like that. Ok, Dusty Baker, slow down a bit before you hand the game ball out. Basically, it sounds like a lot of the Andre songs from Outkast records, just more concise and less annoying. If that's digital Motown then I guess the critics are right.

Rather Ripped Sonic Youth
Supposedly cobbled and formed from little instrumentals Thurston had put together for use in television commercials (according to Thurston in a recent Bust interview)...If that's true than by all means, get this guy some more work with Nabisco and Target. The media angle is that it's Sonic Youth's Terror Twilight, which is maybe the stupidest thing I've read in the last two weeks. It's really just a normal Sonic record, sans the 3 minute noise codas that usually bookend the songs, that just happens to be (in my opinion) maybe the most accessible thing they've ever done. Jeff Clark is right: "Incinerate" sounds like it could have been on Chronic Town.

"Song Against Sex" Neutral Milk Hotel You Tube
MB always talks about how amazing Jeremy Barnes was. I had kind of forgotten, as the last time I saw them, I think, was way before they started playing with like 50 people. Watch this and you may agree. Bonhamesque...man.

The Greatest Cat Power
Somewhat annoying Matador prodigy teams up with old, weathered, BBQeatin Memphis session guys. And somehow, it works, if you don't mind the fact that your dad would probably enjoy it just as much as that Norah Jones record he gave you for Christmas. I never really bought into the Cat Power myth but I thought this was as good a place to start as any.

Out Of Cold Storage This Heat
This Heat would have been perfect for that feature Vice ran a few years ago on "10 Bands who everyone claims to like but no one really does"...except for the fact that no one really claims to like This Heat as no one has really heard of them in the first place. Part of this may stem from the fact that NO ONE really sounds like This Heat, so it's difficult to really cite them as influences for bands you like. That being said, I would be shocked if any of the following (Yo La Tengo, The Slits, The Fall, Stereolab, Broadcast, Radiohead, Slint, Matthew Herbert, Antipop Consortium, Company Flow, Sonic Youth, Pavement, Matmos, Mouse on Mars, Tortoise etc. etc. etc.) have not listened and learned from the small but powerful collection of sounds the band produced from the late 1970s to early 1980s. This box set collects both of their LP's, a much-sought-after maxi single, an essential Peel Session, a less essential posthumous release, and a live record. Consisting of three players, two of whom played standard rock instruments and the third "tapes," and coming out of the same era that produced now radio worthy acts such as Gang of Four and Wire, This Heat sounds more machine than man, more Cage than Kansas, but reserves the right, at any time, to lay down the tightest, most angular, guitar, bass, drum interplay this side of Spiderland. If I haven't sold you on the box set, at least spring for one of the individual records, now in steady re-release.

a glorious triumph.

i spent happy hour last thursday hangin with my best bud from high school, dkirk, who was in town to see a show. when we parted ways and i began my saunter home, i passed the little kings shuffle club. i realized that the inaugural cornhole tournament was taking place that very night; and upon entering the establishment, i realized it had yet to begin.

i immediately dialed kbowman on the cell. he was apparently passed out on the couch, but bravely mustered the energy to venture downtown.

i will not bore you with the details of our triumph, except to note that they were indeed heroic. suffice to say that 4 hours, 6-8 pabsts, and 12 cornhole matches later, we were crowned the champions.

a large trophy will here-and-after sit at the little kings shuffle club. upon it shall be inscribed the names of the winners of this and subsequent cornhole tournaments. but two names will always sit atop the others.

Birmingjam

Just got back from seeing AL natives Brightblack Morninglight/Royal Trux on lot's of downers at Birmingham's newest (and best) answer to longstanding calls for a decent club, the Bottletree. If you are unfamiliar with the Brightblacks, or don't remember seeing them open up for Will Oldham at Orange Twin, they kinda sound like this, or this, or maybe this. Matador picked them up about a year ago as their answer to the whole freakfolk thingy. Since opening up for Oldham, apparently, they've expanded into a four-piece with a percussion section added to the original duo of the guy on guitar and "vocals" and the girl on keys and "vocals." I would put it not too far below those shows that, in my opinion, constitute the greatest shows in the state of Alabama EVER:

• GNR (at the Racetrack circa Lies)
• Drivin' & Cryin' (New Years Eve '93, AL Theatre)
• Nirvana ('94)
• Kool and the Gang (City Stages)
• Pavement (last show of Brighten the Corners tour...lot's of stuff they never play)
• Robert Plant/The Black Crowes (91ish)
• James Taylor (Oak Mtn. Amphitheatre)
• Replacements (last tour ever)

My only regret was that they were playing at the Bottletree, rather than the 2nd greatest bar in Alabama (next to the Garage Cafe), the Florabama, where I think their noodly, pastoral pontifications would have fit perfectly with the sound of the gulf and endless high life. Actually the other regret I have is that I missed my chance at my patented cold-calling "Hi I'm John, would you like to have dinner?" (sans tequilla, Senor Huevos) with a cute redhead who walked off with her friends as I was gathering my nerve. Maybe next time.

With regards to the Bottletree, it's a pretty impressive club, somewhere between the Caledonia and the 40 Watt. One nice touch is that they show movies between acts. Tonight they showed some Jefferson Airplane thing and Saturday featured some hip hop doc with lots of breakdancing and interviews with guys like Kool Herc. Elf Power played there a few months ago, as did Oldham. Liz Durrett is playing at some point. Wolf Eyes comes to town in October, and then it really heats up, with This Heat in early November, Captain Beefheart in late November, Charlemagne Palestine in early December, and a double bill of Three Six Mafia and a reunited Polvo on New Year's Eve. So...I guess you guys can keep acting like Athens is a music town, if you want. Birmingham's the real deal.